‘It’s Okay To Change The Rules’: Fan Overcomes Mental Ward Experience [Fan Feature]
One of the most admirable things about Tech N9ne fans is their ability to push through some of life’s toughest struggles by using music as motivation. The words and ideas that come from Tech N9ne’s music can sometimes be the most powerful message that anyone could receive. Due to what could be called a massive misunderstanding, Dustin Beutler of Spencerville, OH had to endure an experience that could have left most people with few choices. Fortunately, Dustin was not willing to give in to the judgment and criticism of others. Instead, he used Tech N9ne as inspiration to move forward and follow through with his dreams.
Fairly new to the world of Tech N9ne and Strange Music, Dustin has the passion of a veteran:
“I started listening to Tech a year ago the 20th this month. My brother was playing the song ‘Bout Ta Bubble’ and the minute I heard the beat I was a fan. As a Birthday present which was the 20th. He burned all the CD’s he had onto my XBox, and I listened everyday, mostly to Everready, my favorite album.”
Looking for a creative outlet, Tech N9ne fueled his dream of making music of his own. Unfortunately, a misunderstanding during his writing process led to an uneasy experience:
“It started around January 3rd, I had been inspired by Tech’s music to try a small rap (or as we call them here ‘spits’). I set to work and my close friends all loved the first one I wrote ever, so I listened closer to the music. I wrote more and more, I wrote so much sometimes my hand cramped and couldn’t write for a few hours. About a month of this had passed and I had a book full of spits. I was working on a new one I had titled ‘Hypothetical Suicide’ and it was to solidify my reign as top spitter of the Spencerville area. For inspiration I decided to write a fake suicide note, to see how it turned out. I was halfway done in study hall, ready to write what was spinning through my head. I never had a chance; the study hall monitor passed and read it over my shoulder. He grabbed it off my desk and dragged me to the office. I kept saying it was a fake note, but no one listened. They had two people from the Psych Ward come in and take me away. I didn’t leave without a fight, for a minute I felt insane, I was shouting and yelling, kicking and punching, they sprayed mace and it just barely stopped me. After we got to the ward I took a test to see if I was deemed to use silverware and stuff. Then they put me in the room, just thinking about it makes me sick. It was all grey the walls, door, sheets, and everything. I was stuck there for a week, nothing, but me and my thoughts. If they kept me there longer I probably would have went crazy. Just when I thought it couldn’t get worse, it did, back to school everyone knew. Only my family and my three best friends who were like family would talk to me without callin’ me crazy or any name like that, and they never gave me funny looks; yet in my mind I was determined to stop all of it.”
Living through that wasn’t enough to stop Dustin though. Thanks to Tech N9ne’s All 6′s And 7′s, Dustin was able to find the motivation to look past the struggle and finish what he had started:
“Our school was cancelled a lot so we stayed way late in the summer. All 6′s And 7′s came out and my brother bought it. I uploaded it into my XBox and listened to it for the first time. Immediately I loved it, but when it started playing ‘Am I a Psycho’, it became more, it was my album, it made me feel like I was going to be alright. The last words of the hook got me: ‘Yeah I’m a psycho.’ I was inspired immediately I jumped on a piece of paper with my old writing pen, I called it Mr. Inspiration. I started writing and didn’t stop til’ I had it down pat how I wanted it. Now I just had to wait for my chance, and it came. The end-of-the-year talent show. I signed up immediately, people made their jokes, the most frequent was ‘Are you going to escape a straight jacket?’ It made me laugh to see the expressions on their faces when I said ‘No, but they’ll have to put me back in one!’ So the day came it was the talent show and I was pumped, I had my lucky hat on, and I was practicing the articulations for the rythym. It was my turn I stepped onto the stage and it was dead, even the usual whispers stopped. I began, it flowed out, I didn’t even breathe in. When I finished the principal came onto the stage and announced my suspension to the school. This caused everyone to burst in murmurs. After two days of suspension I came back, everyone said hi to me and only the people who never liked me called names. It was the best feeling ever. That’s how Tech helped me with his music. Now I’m saving money for studio time to record one spit I’m proud of, the one I did at the talent show. As for what Tech’s music means to me–I don’t know, I never really thought about it. I guess if I had to answer on the spot I would say it means to me that it’s okay to change the rules of the popularity based statuses that you find in Middle and High school. Thats how I pushed through this mess.”
As Dustin moves on to realize his dream of making music, he is able to look back on that experience and use it to feed his determination. Tech N9ne’s music played a large role in his journey, and like most fans, it has become something he can use to empower himself. Not everyone is the same, and conforming is not always an option. Technicians everywhere can relate to that, especially now that Strangeland is expanding beyond the borders of hip hop music.
-Victor Sandoval, Assistant Editor Strange Music
Follow Victor on Twitter: @VicMSandoval